Addicted
by Grawrr
Summary: I'm horrid at summaries.. Sigh. Life after the Carnival.. Sometimes things don't work out the way you want it to, but everything takes time. Time to heal.. And time to love.


Hmm.. What to say, I read a story, had an idea. Ta-da! Addicted was born! It really has been quite sometime since I posted anything. Here's to make up for that.

_Concerning my fic "A New Beginning" I'm still having trouble with it. Hell I don't even know why I called it that. -_-'_

_Honestly I'm this close. "-" - That close. To putting it out of its misery, meaning it go bye bye._

_OR I might just rewrite it. Some parts I'd keep but I'm just very unhappy with it._

_It's gnawing on me! Consider it on Hiatus until I figure out what to do. Curse you Fic._

Back to this story, place(s) I've mentioned as well as things are in fact real, and inhabit where I live.

I wrote this around five days ago, but it wouldn't upload.

It is un beta.

I tried my best with proofing it, I'm only human.

Be warned there will be mistakes!

**PS: I wasn't able to fix it in Doc Manager, everytime I went to save, it'd go to a blank page. So I apologize for how it turned out.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Mai-Hime nor the characters. If I did I wouldn't be writing I'd be creating (Insert evil laugh here). I don't own the song Whispers in the Dark, Skillet does. Nor do I own Addicted, Kelly Clarkson does. **

With that being said. I hope you enjoy the story! ^_^

Out of all the drugs in this world, you are by far the worst. I just can't seem to get enough of you. Four years ago I couldn't see myself saying that. I always knew something was there but I was young and extremely dense especially about love. Love was the last thing on my mind. After the carnival we both avoided talking, I don't think either of us wanted to discuss 'that' topic, well that's what I thought at first. Four months later you wanted to know how I thought of you. I told you flat out that I couldn't return your feelings. If only I told you the truth.. But like I said I'm dense about love and all those touchy feelings crap. You tend to learn from your mistakes, at least that's what I did. I didn't want you to suffer, you didn't want to push your feelings onto me. What happens next you ask? Well that's to be expected, we drifted apart. You moved back to Kyoto to continue your studying. I stayed at Fuuka till I graduated, luckily I only had to finish another year instead of two. I had to study my ass off during summer, but it was definitely worth it. Thank god for Fumi Himeno for giving me that chance. Any who during that year in school, I missed having you around.. Okay okay I'm lying.. I missed you. Your smile, your laugh, your teases, your glomping. Everything. How I survived, it was freakin' miracle. Well no, it was thanks to Mai and the rest of the gang. I couldn't have done it without them. Yes, even that Spider, I think she helped the most. Never in this life time would I expect Nao to be there for me. I guess hell truly has frozen over.

Ah, I'm rambling again. Gomen. Where was I? Oh yes, after I graduated I got a surprise visit from my Auntie Kairi. Quick character explaining: My auntie Kairi is my mom's sister. My aunt married a Canadian, and well my grandparents when they were alive they didn't agree with that. Unfortunately, they made my aunt choose, family or that 'Bastard'. Obviously, my aunt choose the bastard(my uncle James). Both my mom and my grandparents wanted nothing to do with Kairi so they moved to Canada and started their life. My aunt had no idea about the death of her parents or sister or anything for that matter. Now you're wondering how they found me? Simple! My good for nothing father told them. To say my aunt and uncle were surprised would be a definite understatement. They flew all the way to Fuuka just to see me. And this is where it began, they offered me to stay with them. Now who the hell does that? You don't see your niece for fifteen years. And out of the blue you offer her to stay with you. No logic whatsoever. Family I'll never understand it.. But I'm trying. I spent a couple of days thinking about their offer to move into their house in Canada. After much thought, I agreed. I just wanted to get away. Back then I kept telling myself that I wanted to escape the past of the carnival, and my mother's death. _But what I really wanted to get away from was the memories of you that constantly haunt me. _I figured that maybe if I were in a different place it'd help. I'd get a fresh start, be who I wanna be, and just move on from the Carnival as well as everything else. Mai and everyone, they were sad about my decision but they accepted it. Everyone thought it'd be good to actually be with family, the feeling which I had forgotten.

Life in Canada was well different, but in a good way. Only downside to it was the winters were freakin' cold. My aunt and uncle, not only did they give me a roof over my head, they also offered to pay for my schooling. At first I didn't know what to do. Being here, really changed me for the better. Just the first few months I noticed a change it was small but it was progressing. After working at a daycare near the house for a few months. I knew what I wanted to go to school for. A teacher. Funny, how everything works in life. Never in a million years did I ever think about being a Elementary teacher. I guess that just tells you how much I changed. _Yet I still miss you._

That year I enrolled in the U of A. I met a handful of cool people that I'm proud to say are my friends. There's Amy, Alex, Ryan and Kyle, these guys are the ones I hang out with the most. The rest are just school friends, that's all. Amy she's a weird one, but there's something about her that makes everyone smile. Her personality is a rare one. She'll walk into a room and BAM all eyes are on her. Her cheerful attitude is something I like most about her. The only way you'll see the real her is if you're close enough to her. She's shorter than me, the top of her head comes up to my chin. I bug her constantly about it. She has chestnut tresses that come down just past her shoulder, with a pair of the brightest blue eyes I've ever seen. Her skin is fair, amazing complexion. Her figure is slim but curvy in all the right places. Ah, enough of her, I could keep going on, and on but I should introduce the rest. Alex he's really quiet and shy. He just doesn't talk much but that's cause he hasn't warmed up to me yet. He's the baby among us, him being the youngest and all. He even has a baby face! He has an average build, as well as an average height, and for once someone is paler then me. His actual hair color is unknown as he always dyes it. Right now he has the base black with red highlights, his hair isn't too long nor is it too short. It's always in a messy style. His eyes, really suit him, they're a dark violet. Ryan is next up, he's a bit of a flirt but not a player. Unlike most guys, they don't respect women, he truly does. He is overly, and I do mean overly protective of Amy, and I. I guess he takes the role of big brother, he is the oldest among us. Once people find out Amy and I know Ryan, men they tend to back off and run with their tail between their legs, I can't blame them. You don't want to mess with Ryan. He fits the tall, dark, and handsome saying, but he's on the muscular side. He has light brown skin, with short dark brown hair, always in a messy style. His eyes are a bright hazel, warm and comforting is what I see in his eyes. He seems like a badass, but really he's a softie who loves the ones close to him. Last but definitely least is Kyle. There's nothing really to explain about him. Blahh, fine! Kyle is well Kyle.. He's outgoing, loud, playful and loves to piss me off. But I do care for him. When it comes down to it, he can be extremely serious, a totally different person. Just don't get on his bad side. Kyle is also tall, he has some muscle build to him, but not as much as Ryan. There's a bit of a tan to him with sandy brown hair, I guess you could say he has drummer hair, but not overly long, it suits him. His eyes are pale green, when I look into his eyes I see that damn spider.

Even though I made new friends, I still haven't forgotten about my old ones. I still talk to Mai but not as much, she's in her last year of high school and university is tough. Both of us have busy schedules, it's hard to find the time to talk. But I'm not worried. Mai and I, we'll be friends regardless.

A couple of friends had a band started, the only thing they needed was a singer and a name. After a night of Karaoke they wanted me to be their singer. And yes I can sing if I want to, before I didn't want Mai and the others knowing I could sing. I would be their lead singer and play the piano when needed, that's another secret no one knows about. Amy; Lead Guitarist and Back Vocals. Alex; Bass. Ryan; Guitar. Kyle; Drums. Picking the name of the band was a tough one, until I suggested Crimson Omen, they all loved it. So our band is known as Crimson Omen. Our band started out more as something to do in our free time, but that changed. Another one of our friends decided it would be 'fun' to sign us up for battle of the bands. Not one to back down, we all took the challenge and won. We even got offered a contract but we declined it. We're in school for a reason. Duh! We still perform at small places just for the fun of it. _Even after all the excitement, I still find myself thinking about you. I hope you're okay. And I hope that one day we'll meet again.._

With year one done, it was time to start year two. Not much has changed here.. Well I suppose I have. I'm forever changing. And it's for the better. If only you could see me now, I wonder what you'd think.. Or say. Maybe for once you'd be speechless. Shocked even, to see the girl.. No woman I have become. I'm not the same.. I'm brand new, and I've never felt so.. Alive. Unfortunately people tend to move on. However, I still think of you, you'll always be my best friend.

Oh silly me, I forgot to mention the most interesting thing this year.. I have fallen, so hard, and so deep. I'm crushing big time on my friend Amy. She's amazing and she is, besides myself, the only girl in the band. Kickass Guitar player that she is. Turns out she returns my feelings. This year we began dating. And I've never felt so happy.

Year three

Amy and I are still dating, can't believe it's been a year. And I can't believe I'm dating a girl, if I were still my old self, this wouldn't be happening. Mind you, I'd still be in my own little world. I think you've grown on me. Even though you're not here, you have definitely influenced my thinking. Thumbs up for women.

During this year Amy and I decided to take our relationship to the next level. And some how.. I have absolutely no idea how! But the guys found out about it. And to add to my torment, they just HAD to play "I Just Had Sex". Right then and there I was willing to commit murder. Yet all Amy could do was laugh. I couldn't help but stare at her as if she grew another head. But seeing her smile and laugh so freely, I just had to join in. _I could also picture you teasing me about it._

Year four

Amy, she reminds me of you so much. She has the same color of hair as you, but her eyes are a bright blue but they will never compare to your eyes. Her manners are the same, she loves to tease me. Besides that all she needs is your accent. All of it reminds me of you. I don't know why it took me so long. I can see now what I couldn't see back then. That I, Natsuki Kuga am in love with you, Shizuru Fujino. I asked Mai about you. It seems neither she or anyone from our gang has heard from you. I know you're okay. I believe it with every fiber of my being.

After talking to Mai about it, I did the right thing and broke up with Amy, she was hurt, but she knew I loved someone even before I did. She wanted to be the one I thought of, the only one I see. But I think she knew she couldn't compete with the one who already holds my heart.

I really can't believe I didn't notice it sooner. It took me four years to fully realize what you mean to me. I just don't understand it. I mean come on! Putting the pieces together it was so god damn obvious. I thought about you constantly, everything about you. Hell I'd even dream about you. Maybe just maybe I was holding onto the past, wanting things to return to normal between us, our friendship. I was stuck in the past. But we're both far beyond that. I don't want that past anymore, if I can help it. I want a future, not as friends, but more. I want to be your lover. _Life was so beautiful when you shower this selfless affection on me._

You, Shizuru are my addiction. Worse than mayo. I crave for you, no not lust. C-R-A-V-E. I need my fix, my daily dose. I feed off your energy. Just from your presence alone, I feel as if I can do anything and everything. Oh my sweet drug, drown me in your essence. Let me breathe you in, take me high, and higher like never before. I'm addicted. _Shizuru withdrawals are the worst._

I finally finished schooling, and it's time I return home. To you.

My band mates joined me on my trip home even Amy. They said they wanted to see the place I talked so much about it, and meet the people I cherish.

It feels amazing to back at home. I have yet to see everyone though. I blame Kyle for that. He's the one that handles the performances we do, and him being him, well he set one up prior to coming here. So first day being back I'm stuck doing a performance. Oh goody. Turns out we have quite the fan base. The power of Youtube. We were smart about this though. Knowing that performances tend to be recorded, we have disguises that we always wear. This is _no_ exception.

Have I said how amazing it feels to back home? I'm excited to see everyone. Mostly to see their reaction, I haven't told anyone about my return. I've changed so much and learned so much. I'm sure Mai knows I've changed but I'm sure she doesn't know how much. I haven't talked to her enough for her to notice the extent of it. All I have to do is get this performance over with and I'll see- WTF! Mai, Nao, Chie, Aoi, Mikoto, Akira, Takumi, Yohko, Midori, Yukino, Reito, Haruka.. And is that, no it couldn't be! Mai said she'd tell me if she heard anything from her! Yet here you are standing in the front with the rest of the gang. _Shizuru._

Having noticed my slight discomfort she couldn't but voice concern "Natsuki you okay?"

Snapping from my thoughts I look into the direction the voice was coming from "I'm fine Amy.. Just do you see those people in the front row?"

"The rowdy bunch?"

"Haha yeah, those are my friends."

"They seem like a lively bunch."

"You have no idea."

"Is that really all that's bothering you? I can't see you freakin' out just cause of them."

"Well there's more, you see the one with the chestnut colored hair, red eyes?"

"Hmm.. Bingo I see her."

"That would be her."

"You mean thee her?"

"Guyssssssssssssss we're going on soon. Is everyone excited or what?"

"Yes that would be her."

"Huh am I missing something here?"

"Geez Kyle don't you know it's rude to eavesdrop!"

"Hey! I wasn't eavesdropping, I merely telling you that we're going on soon, not my fault I heard some of the conversation. Now who is her?"

"You're unbelievable."

"Why thank you Amy I try."

"Are you two done your bickering now?"

"Yes yes. Now Natsuki who is her?"

"Why is everyone huddled up over."

"Greatttt."

"Natsuki and I were having private conversation, until Kyle and now you Ryan have interrupted it."

"Heh heh. Sorry?"

"Hai hai, Alex get over here, I don't want you interrupting either."

"Coming! So what's going on?"

"Ah! Quick recap, front row over there Natsuki's friends. Girl with chestnut colored hair, red eyes. Her."

"Who is her?"

"Just shut up Natsuki is about to tell us. Geez men."

"As I was saying. Her; meaning she is Shizuru."

"Ohhhhh HER! I got ya."

"So what's the plan?"

"I think we can make an exception this time. What do you guys say?"

"HELL YEAH!"

"Haha thanks guys, you sure about it?"

"We're all sure. You only get one shot to make a grand entrance. Why not use it?"

"Alright, alright! It's show time."

Once we got to our positions on stage, we gave the thumbs up to have the curtains pulled back. I could see all of you guys cheering loudly, screaming the band name, chanting it. I could see you, the girl who would never be caught doing that. Actually cheering with them. _I'm not the only one who changed am I, Shizuru?_

Pulling myself away from my thoughts I asked huskily, "How is everyone doing tonight?"

All I focused on was you guys, mostly you. I heard all your answering and couldn't help but chuckle.

"Usually before we perform we have pointless talking for you guys to hear. But I'm sure most of you are aware of that."

"Now I'm sure everyone here is wondering why a small time Canadian band is here at Fuuka?"

"Well to sum it up. My band mates are all Canadian, except for myself, I'm Japanese. In fact, I'm from Fuuka!"

The look of shock on all your faces was absolutely priceless, I'll be sure to bug you guys about this, even you Shizuru! It's nice to see your mask off, showing the real you.

"Shocking isn't it? I can even see alot of people I know, who I consider good friends. With that being said, let the show begin!"

I looked at my band mates asking if they're ready, I was answered with a hell yeah and their disguises being thrown to the ground. Time for mine to go. I removed my fedora, my shades, and took my hair out of my ponytail. I glanced at you guys and couldn't help but laugh. Every single one of you had you jaw wide open. Not you though, your mouth was slightly open, your eyes were widen and you looked like you were shaking. I saw your trembling hand move to cover your mouth. _What are you thinking Shizuru?_

"This song is called Whispers In The Dark!"

I began playing the piano, standing up of course.

I started to sing the lyrics in a quiet voice,

"Despite the lies that you're making

Your love is mine for the taking

My love is just waiting

To turn your tears to roses"

After I finished singing the first part the rest of the band kicked in and I kicked up my voice.

I started singing and I kept my gaze firmly on my friends.

"Despite the lies that you're making

Your love is mine for the taking

My love is just waiting

To turn your tears to roses"

"I will be the one that's gonna hold you

I will be the one that you run to

My love is a burning, consuming fire"

"No, you'll never be alone

When darkness comes

I'll light the night with stars

Hear my whispers in the dark"

"No, you'll never be alone

When darkness comes

You know I'm never far

Hear my whispers in the dark"

"Whispers in the dark"

"You feel so lonely and ragged

You lay here broken and naked

My love is just waiting

To clothe you in crimson roses"

"I will be the one that's gonna find you

I will be the one that's gonna guide you

My love is a burning, consuming fire"

"No, you'll never be alone

When darkness comes

I'll light the night with stars

Hear my whispers in the dark"

"No, you'll never be alone

When darkness comes

You know I'm never far

Hear the whispers in the dark"

"No, you'll never be alone

When darkness comes

I'll light the night with stars

Hear my whispers in the dark"

"No, you'll never be alone

When darkness comes

You know I'm never far

Hear the whispers in the dark"

"Whispers in the dark

Whispers in the dark

Whispers in the dark"

The crowd was cheering wildly, it's truly a amazing feeling, but seeing you and everyone else screaming my name, is the greatest feeling.

We performed Three other songs after "Whispers In The Dark".

It was time for the grand finale. This song, was meant for you.

"How many people here have been in love?" I curiously asked.

Once again a roar of noise was my answer. But I could clearly hear my friends. Especially Mikoto, "I love Mai." I could see you nodding your head slowly.

I kept my gaze firmly planted on you as I spoke "They say love is blind, that is definitely true. But in this case it was I who was blind. It took me years to realize my love. I knew something was there, but I thought it was me wanting the past, for things to be as they were. Our friendship."

"For those who are wondering why I thought that, you try having your precious person leave your life. And then you tell me what it is you desire."

"Unfortunately, while coming to this conclusion, not only did I hurt the one who holds my heart. But I also hurts someone else I care deeply for."

"During my time in school, I met someone, crushed on her, then eventually loved her. But it was thanks to her. To Amy, that I realized who it is I was truly in love with."

"Now, now before you start thinking I'm a horrible person, this I already know. Amy already forgave me, otherwise we wouldn't be here performing. Crimson Omen would be without their Kickass guitar playing Chick. Funny thing is she knew about it even before I did."

"This song is our newest creation. Well my lyrics, their playing, you get the point."

"Addicted is the name of it. You are by far my worst addiction, this one is for you, Shizuru."

For this song I chose to sit down, my fingers on the keys, and I began singing for you.

"It's like you're a drug

It's like you're a demon I can't face down

It's like I'm stuck

It's like I'm running from you all the time

And I know I let you have all the power

It's like the only company I seek is misery all around

It's like you're a leech

Sucking the life from me

It's like I can't breathe

Without you inside of me

And I know I let you have all the power

And I realize I'm never gonna quit you over time"

Que drums, guitar coming in red hot.

I grabbed the mic into my hands to free it from the stand, I hurriedly stood and starting walking towards the front of the stage, while singing.

"It's like I can't breathe

It's like I can't see anything

Nothing but you

I'm addicted to you

It's like I can't think

Without you interrupting me

In my thoughts

In my dreams

You've taken over me

It's like I'm not me

It's like I'm not me"

Walking back to my piano, I continued playing while standing.

"It's like I'm lost

It's like I'm giving up slowly

It's like you're a ghost that's haunting me

Leave me alone

And I know these voices in my head

Are mine alone

And I know I'll never change my ways

If I don't give you up now"

"It's like I can't breathe

It's like I can't see anything

Nothing but you

I'm addicted to you|

It's like I can't think

Without you interrupting me

In my thoughts

In my dreams

You've taken over me

It's like I'm not me

It's like I'm not me"

Let the fun begin, while singing I started to approach you.

"I'm hooked on you

I need a fix

I can't take it

Just one more hit

I promise I can deal with it

I'll handle it, quit it

Just one more time

Then that's it

Just a little bit more to get me through this"

Standing in front of you, I gazed deeply into your eyes, while singing from the bottom of my heart.

"I'm hooked on you

I need a fix

I can't take it

Just one more hit

I promise I can deal with it

I'll handle it, quit it

Just one more time

Then that's it

Just a little bit more to get me through this"

I walked back onto the stage, pressing my fingers into the correct keys of the piano while belting out the last part of the song.

"It's like I can't breathe

It's like I can't see anything

Nothing but you

I'm addicted to you

It's like I can't think

Without you interrupting me

In my thoughts

In my dreams

You've taken over me

It's like I'm not me

It's like I'm not me"

Loud cheers is what awarded us after we finished. Most chanting Crimson Omen, some chanting Natsuki. Bowing to our fans we thanked them for coming tonight to see us, and hoped they enjoyed the rest of their night, after that we made our exit.

We all were seated on the second floor in the club, we could clearly see below us and around us. I tried looking for you after the performance but I couldn't find you. I figured if you were still in the club hopefully I'd see you. But I didn't.

Twenty minutes passed by and we all decided it was time to head out. The plane ride back and the concert really tired us out.

After exiting the club, I realized I didn't have my jacket. I told them to go back without me, and that I'd see them later.

It was then, at that moment, I felt like a complete and utter fool. I found my jacket, but I also found you and your 'friend' in a compromising position. I grabbed my jacket and took one last look at you before I started turning away. I'm pretty sure you saw me from your peripheral vision because your head snapped towards my direction. Turning my head to look at you, I gave you a sad smile and walked away, out of your life.

I couldn't register anything at that moment, not where I walked nor the sound around me. It was like I went deaf but I knew that wasn't true, because I could hear loud and clear the sound of my heart breaking. _Is this how you felt when I rejected you Shizuru?_

I have no idea how but I finally made it outside. The fresh air did little to help calm me. I walked towards my bike, as much as I wanted to ride it, I knew for fact that I shouldn't. But why do I care? Mind unstable, pfft please I've been through worse. If I were to die, I'd face it guns blazing.

I began pulling out of the parking lot, not going too fast because of the people around. Once I was freed from there I picked up a bit more speed and started driving away still keeping my speed at a low. You never know when some crazy drunk person is gonna come out of- WTF!

Despite my mental state I was able to react fast, and applied the brakes minorly skidding to a stop. Getting off my bike, I ripped off my helmet mentally fuming on why the hell someone would do that. You may be drunk but seriously come the fuck on! Show some god damn common sense! I'm asking for too much aren't I?

"Are you out of your fucking mind! I understand crossing but you just don't stand there! What if I hit you!" I roared at the girl, I couldn't see her face, her head was tilted down, with her hair in the way.

She looked up at me, and my breath got caught in my throat. Surely my eyes are playing tricks on me? Or have I finally gone insane?

"Natsuki?" She questioned me. I could see her trembling, well I would be to if I almost got hit. Geez.

"What the hell were you thinking? I could have seriously hurt you!" I stared at her, trying not to let my inner turmoil show.

"I-I Nat-suki I-" Huh?

Sighing, I began to walk towards her, no matter what she does I can never stay mad at her. I stood in front of her, relaxing my face a little to show her I wasn't mad, that I was concerned. "Shizuru what were you thinking?"

She looked up at me, tears streaming down her face, her lips trembling. She caught me off guard by grabbing my jacket and pulling me to her. Her face buried into my neck, I could feel her ragged breaths hitting my neck, her tears soaking it. I wrapped my arms around her, rubbing her back hoping to soothe her. I must have really shaken her up pretty bad.

Once again I was caught off guard. She spoke into my neck "Don't leave me. Not again. Please stay with me."

I wasn't sure what to think or say. _What does she mean by that?_

I pulled her away from my body, keeping her at arms length. I gazed hopelessly into her eyes, trying.. No hoping to figure out what she was thinking, what she meant by those words. I put my hand on her cheek, caressing it. Wiping the tears from her eyes, a futile attempt in trying to see what lays in the depth of your eyes.

As if she sensed my inner turmoil, she put her hand on mine, and leaned into my hand. Closing her eyes to enjoy the moment, she began to slowly caress my hand. Opening her eyes, she gazed into mine. I could see the depths of your soul, I could also see your undying love.

"Natsuki, I love you, only you. There is no other. It is you who holds my hearts, it's always been you. So please don't leave. Stay here, with me, by my side. My Natsuki."

Tears were swelling in my eyes, all I could do was let them fall. My hand still touching your cheek, I used my other arm and wrapped it around your waist, pulling you closer to me. I brushed my lips against yours, and whispered "My Shizuru" before I let my lips meet your eager ones. It is gentle, but captivating. Mesmerized lips press together time after time. Ragged breathing, our lips continue to mash as we become lost in a sea of lust and love. The waves of passion crashing over us, as our kisses grow more urgent. Our lips pull apart, breathing comes out in short, desperate gasps.

Trying to calm my erratic breathing, I could see that you were doing no better than I. The sound of a horn pulls us away from our thoughts. Gently, I take your hand in mine, leading you to my bike. I put my helmet on you, after making sure it's securely on I start driving away. I can feeling your arms wrapped tightly around my waist, your head against my back. This feeling, I never thought I'd miss it as much as I did. You never questioned where I was taking us, I know you don't care as long as we're together.

We finally reached our destination, the hotel I was staying at.

"Ara ara. Is Natsuki playing to do naughty things to me?" You faked gasped, as your hand went to cover your mouth.

_Why am I not surprised? Heh I knew you'd say something along those lines._ "What if I was?" I questioned her, mirth clearly shining in my eyes.

I was rewarded with a blush. Chuckling, I reached for your hand, leading you to my room.

After we got inside, I gestured for you to have a seat on the sofa. While I proceeding into the kitchen to get some drinks.

Calling out from the kitchen I asked "Shizuru what would you like to drink?"

I could hear you mumbling something before you replied "Anything is fine."

_Shouldn't have said that._ Grinning, I reached into the mini fridge, pulling out two bottles of Mike's Hard Lemonade: Cranberry flavored. Taking them with me, I went back into the sitting area. I twisted the cap off the bottle before offering it to you. Surprisingly you accepted it, I thought you would for sure turn it down. _Interesting._

I sat down beside you. Twisting off my cap, before taking a drink I spoke "Be careful, it's Canadian."

The look you gave me was priceless. I bet you're thinking what is that suppose to mean?

I watched you carefully, studying you as you took a sip from the cool, alcoholic beverage. You swallowed the liquid that was in your mouth, while pulling the bottle away. Incredulously, you stared at it. It was my laughter that brought you back to earth.

"It's got quite a interesting kick to it, doesn't it? But it still tastes amazing. Cranberry is my favorite flavor." I told you, grinning from ear to ear.

"Ara, I agree with Natsuki. I assume one could get intoxicated if not careful."

"Yup! After the first couple of bottles you don't taste the alcohol, only the cranberry."

"So Natsuki is trying to get me drunk? I wonder what dirty things she's thinking of in that mind of hers."

"Hey! Nothing dirty going on in here. Just thought alcohol would settle the nerves."

Chuckling at me you spoke "I know Natsuki I'm just teasing you."

Smiling sweetly at her I voiced out "I know, trust me I know."

We stayed silent for minutes, neither of us wanted to speak. We were both happy to be near one another after being apart for four years. But I just had to know. "That girl, the girl who you were embracing and.." Not able to voice out the rest I quickly said "Who was she?" _Who is she to you?_

I could see guilt swimming in your eyes. _Why are you guilty?_ You immediately tensed up, your jaw tightening.. _Why?_ Your appendage peaked out from your mouth to wet your suddenly dry lips. _Why are you so nervous?_

Fearing for the worst, I didn't want to hear the answer. "Never mind, forget I asked." I said with a dull voice, I chugged the rest of my drink. Putting it on the table, I then stood up to get another one. _I'm definitely gonna need it. _That got your attention, I glanced at you briefly before I went back to the kitchen. I couldn't see your expression, I do wonder what you are thinking.

Once I got into the kitchen I pulled out two more bottles. Twisting the cap off one then throwing it on the counter, I quickly slammed it back. After finishing it, I forcefully put it on the counter, not cause I was upset, but because I drank it too fast. Feel the burn.

I emerged from the kitchen, moving to my seat. You were staring at me, with that unreadable mask of yours. Your gazed seemed to linger on the hand which held my drink.

Finally reaching my seat, I sat down. Once again, I twisted the cap off and threw it on the table. Taking a huge gulp from my drink. Alcohol works wonders, doesn't it? It's just so soothing, yet has the power to make you an emotional wreck. Gotta love it.

Your voice pulled me from my thoughts "Natsuki?" your voice was hesitant, I wonder why?

"Hmm." was the only reply I could muster. I glanced at you from the corner of my eye; fidgeting. You seemed to be contemplating on what to say next.

You took a deep breath before speaking "Natsuki..Natsuki wasn't suppose to see that-"

Lovely. "What the heck is that suppose to mean?"

You turned your body to face me, you placed my drink on the table then grabbed my hands "Natsuki look at me." Your hold on my hands tightened. "Please look at me."

Steeling myself, I turned my body to yours. My gazed telling you to continue.

"Her name is Anh Lu. She's a good friend who I met in Kyoto. That's all she is, and will ever be."

I didn't trust my voice so I nodded. You took that as a sign to proceed.

"The reason you weren't suppose to see that, was because I didn't want to hurt you." I opened my mouth to reply, but you gave me that look, so I reluctantly shut my mouth.

"Anh knows about you Natsuki. She knows how I feel about you. After the performance she helped me look for you. While looking for you, Anh wanted to get a drink. The men besides the bar were flirting with us, not wanting to get kicked out, we told them we were dating. Of course that lead us into the position of proving our lie. That was when you came into the picture."

"You two seem a little to close to be just good friends." I mumbled out.

"That's all we are Natsuki. Anh Lu has a girlfriend. Besides, my lips are meant for my Natsuki. Not Anh's neck."

_Yup that really did it. How does she manage to do that especially at a time such a this?_

"I'm fulfilled. It's been so long since I last seen my Natsuki blush."

"Only for you, my Shizuru." this time it was I who was rewarded with a blush. Chuckling, I spoke "I could get use to this sight."

"Does this mean Natsuki is mine?"

"Of course I thought you already knew that?"

"So Natsuki is my girlfriend?" You teased, but I could tell that you just wanted to be sure.

"I am yours for however long you want me for."

"So for eternity?"

"Yes for eternity, my Addiction."

I had serious trouble finding a good place to end it, I figured here should be a good ending, yes?

**Crimson Omen**, can anyone tell me where I got it from?

It's not associated with Mai-Hime but it certainly fits how Natsuki views Shizuru.

Anyone who answers correctly gets a _invisible_ cookie! =D


End file.
